Brad passed away this past weekend, too young at 41. He is memorialized, among other places, here.
If it weren’t 3 in the morning, I’d probably be more eloquent, but I can’t sleep, so I’m just going to write.
Brad Graham was among the first bloggers I got to know online — which makes sense, since he was one of the first bloggers, period. The guy gave the blogosphere its name, for godsakes. Through his blog, comments on mine and other blogs, and frequent postings on MetaFilter, I became acquaintances with Brad, and met him for the first time at a blogger meetup of some sort. But it wasn’t until 2004 that he became a friend.
My first trip to SXSW Interactive (“summer camp for web nerds, it’s been described) was in 2004. Alison and I were in search of the evening’s events after she picked me up from the airport, and came across Brad and Nikolai in the Omni Hotel lobby. As the four of us talked and then headed to The Paradise to meet up with others, Brad and I hit it off famously as he told stories and shared advice about attending the conference. I saw a lot of him over the next few days, including hearing him tell one of his amazing stories at Fray Cafe, about picking up a bulk order of condoms (for a theatre production) at an STD clinic. Brad was one of the people I most looked forward to seeing when SXSWi 2005 rolled around. And it was at Break Bread with Brad that following year that I knew I was back among friends. “TheBrad” was once again being his funny old self, introducing people to their new closest friends and making sure nobody felt left out.
We developed a playful undercurrent of flirtation and innuendo (then again, everything was an innuendo with Brad) over the years; he’d casually hit on me, and I’d play the tease right back. Even Cinnamon got in the act.
You could always count on Brad for a joke or a story, but I also cherished the quiet moments talking with him in the hallways at South-By, and the few times we got to hang out back in Chicago on one of his visits up from St. Louis. I once spent several hours at SideTracks on Musical Night just to hang out with him — that’s how great a guy he was.
I’ve always held storytellers in the highest regard, and Brad was one of the best I’ve ever known, able to reel you in and deliver the punchline — whether funny or poignant — with perfect timing. I’ll never forget his story of taking George Clooney to a gay bar, and so many other bon mots over the years.
When we were down in St. Louis the weekend before Christmas to visit with Naz and Jen, I considered getting in touch to see if we could meet up, but we were only there for a short while, and besides, I’d see him in March, right? I’m kicking myself now for not calling him, although if he was sick he probably wouldn’t have come out. It would have been nice to have talked to him one last time, though. I feel like I barely saw him at SXSWi 2009, and now I wont have another chance.
It’s going to be weird not seeing him at SXSWi this year. Plans are afoot to organize a Break Bread for Brad to memorialize him; I hope to be a part of it in some way. If he were able to attend himself, he’d be telling us not to be sad, so I hope that whatever comes to pass has more in common with an Irish wake than an Italian one, and friends come together to tell stories and celebrate his life.
I’ll miss you, Brad. I feel lucky to have been counted as your friend.
